A Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Workbook

A recent opinion piece on CNN came out about a book by Dr. Louann Brizendine, clinical professor of psychiatry at UCSF, that caught my attention and so I had to read further (a sign of good marketing). The book is The Male Brain a follow up to her past book The Female Brain and it basically states that the classic stereotypical male attributes (e.g., automatically looking at women’s breasts, lacking empathy, oversexed) can now be explained from a neuroscientific perspective. In other words, neuroscience can now explain John Gray’s famous book Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.

I thought, “Wow, this is astounding,” but something didn’t feel 100% kosher here. I dug deeper. In a New York Times book review, Emily Bazelon more or less says that Brizendine’s book is a highly lopsided account of the facts for the purpose of high power marketing. She says:

“Brizendine nods to the fact that the brains of men and women are mostly alike. But her emphasis is entirely on the “profound differences” between them. This is clearly the best-seller strategy, neatly bisected into two books.”

It’s important to keep in mind that the world of literature is still a business wanting to appeal to what is going to affect their bottom line for the good. Right now, the brain and neuroscience are very popular. I’ve certainly been writing more about them as I come to learn more. For example:

Neuroplasticity, Gratitude, and Your Mental Health: Food for Thought

Neuroplasticity: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

The Neuroscience of Happiness: An Interview with Rick Hanson, Ph.D.

The Power of Mindsight: An Interview with Dr. Daniel Siegel

It’s exciting to know more about this awe-inspiring mysterious organ that may hold the seat to our consciousness as human beings.

It’s also exciting to come to understand that we are active participants in our health and well-being and actually have the ability to change the neural connections in our brains through intentionally paying attention to what is healthy in life.

However, we have to be careful as more and more information comes out to really vet the intentions of the source.  

Bazelon says:

“Many scientists are cautious to a fault when it comes to telling us what they’re unsure of, playing down any novel finding that hasn’t been verified by another scientist. Not so Louann Brizendine.”

I did a bit more research with some neuroscientists in the field and found that when I read her book, I’ll need to truly take her claims with a grain of salt as, while it’s very interesting, there is little research behind this and when there is any it is highly overstated and overemphasized. What we might begin to become aware of is that hearing or reading someone who has a “Dr.” prefix before their name can make their claims seem very convincing.

The bottom line is that it’s good to question books, television and Blogs out there, not believing everything. We might want to ask, what is the intention behind putting out this information? Is it to improve our understanding and help people, is it to satisfy certain corporate entities or is it to make money? The answer may not be so black and white, but it’s important to keep these questiosn in mind.

What are your thoughts on this? Please share what pops up in your mind, any questions or stories. Your interaction here provides a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.

Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com

Here we are again with Monday’s Mindful Quote. I was just reading through Therese Borchard’s book Beyond Bluewhen I came across quote that struck me and I thought may do the same for you. Here are a couple quotes on perseverance.

From a Buddhist Saying:

“If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking.”

And

From Anonymous:

“The great oak was once a little nut who held its own ground.”

Life throws us struggles, sometimes more, sometimes less. Some people are born into this world with a genetic prevalence for anxiety, depression, bipolar, among others, while others grow into these states of mind and body through the course of traumatic nurture.

However, one thing that is a true-ism is that most of us do not have much patience for perseverance in the face of not feeling well and perceived setbacks. Our negative self-talk is so convincing and believable we truly believe “things will never get better” or “I’m a failure” or the classic, “what’s the point.”

It’s almost as if at those times we need to access something outside of ourselves, someone who is on steady ground to hold our hands and say, “here, this is the way, just take my hand I’ll lead you there, step by step.”

One practice that is helpful in accessing this wise part of yourself who can point the way or be a guide is to ask yourself if there is a person or sentient being out there, living or dead, who you look up to. Some people say, God, others say, Buddha, while others say Mother Theresa, their parents, Jesus, a good friend, etc…

Then ask yourself, what would they say to do? Often whatever that answer is points the way to some action that can lead you “facing in the right direction” and how “all we have to do is keep on walking.”

When things are difficult for you, what is the right direction for you? Who do you look up to as a guide?

Please share your thoughts about this as your entry below will likely help many others who are struggling with the very issue of perseverance in working with their struggles. In other words, your additions create a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.

Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com

I’ll be interviewing James Baraz in the not-too-distant future, but I thought the topic that he writes about his latest book Awakening Joy: 10 Steps That Will Put You on the Road to Real Happiness is pertinent enough to let you know about it now rather than later so you don’t have to wait to know about it. I have people that come into my practice all the time that lament about losing their sense of “joy” in life. So how do we cultivate more joy in our lives?

The practice is one that takes some audacity and intention. Why audacity? Because we live in a culture that seems to focus on distress so often and feel there is an unworthiness for experiencing joy. If you’re not feeling particularly well, you may have had the experience of feeling aversion to those who were expressing joy at the time. A voice might have crept up, “If only he was feeling a little lower, then I’d be happy.” This is nothing to be ashamed of, it happens quite automatically because it reminds us that we aren’t experiencing the joy we’d like.

In order to actively cultivate joy, we need to first practice being present. In a past interview with Rick Hanson, author of Buddha’s Brain he told us about ways to “incline the mind toward the good.” I developed a national research program about cultivating sacred moments in daily life for stress reduction and well-being. All of these are based on being present first. Why?

Psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl says it best:

“Between Stimulus and response, there’s a space, in that space lies our power to choose our response, in our response lies our growth and our freedom.”

We need to be able to recognize that space so we can choose to get out of our habitual cycles of potential negative rumination and realize we have a choice and that choice may be to practice ways to awaken joy in our lives or incline our minds toward the good. This is not to ignore the difficulties in our lives, but just to help correct the automatic negativity bias that’s neurologically built in as a survival mechanism.

But, we want to do more than survive, we want to live well.

I’ve now heard this practice from a few people including Tara Brach and now Carolyn Hobbs, author of Joy, No Matter What. This is something Carolyn said in James Baraz’s book, Awakening Joy:

“We often think if only life were a little different—better, easier, more comfortable, more in my favor—then I could feel joy. We hold our joy out there like a carrot on a stick, saying, ‘When I get through this conflict with my boss or my mother, then maybe I’ll have a moment of joy, or when I get past my depression, my despair, my loneliness…’ But the potential for joy is always present, and the key to accessing it is saying ‘Yes’ to whatever is true in this moment, whether or not we like what’s going on or expect it.

“This of something in your life that you’re not too happy about—perhaps a conflict, a health issue, something you wish hadn’t appeared at all. Without any judgment, notice your first reaction. Then try saying ‘Yes’ to this situation. Notice what happens inside you as you do this. What you’re experiencing may not be what you wanted or expected, but saying yes can empower you and give you the courage to handle whatever rests on your plate.”

What gives you joy or holds you back from joy? Please share your thoughts, stories and questions below. Your interaction provides a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.

Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com

My life can often appear to be hectic. At times it feels like I overload myself with more things than I could possibly ever accomplish. As I’m going to sleep, my mind wanders with all the things I need to get done, and when I’m awake during the day I catch my mind thinking about all the things that need to get done. Take a shower, make coffee, eat breakfast, brush my teeth, write, go see clients, etc. … When I’m not mindful, at the end of the day I can truly ask myself, “Where did the day go?” Enough of these, and I can ask myself the same questions in weeks, months, or even years! Can you relate to this?

So when I feel like these questions are coming up, I do some brief exercises that help bring me to the present moment and remind myself that I’m living.

1. For 5 minutes: Whatever you are doing, just do it slightly slower. At work, we are all given tasks to do. One time per day, for 5 minutes, do that task a little bit slower. Do not do the task in slow motion, or take breaks from the task, simply do it a little bit slower.

2. Take 5 minutes at lunch to notice what you’re eating. You can actually do this at an meal, or any time you eat. You are going to notice what your food looks like, how it smells, feels, and tastes. As you pick up your food, notice the texture of it, is it bumpy, smooth, wet? Notice what you smell. As you take it in your mouth notice how it feels in your mouth, notice the tastes that are coming out of it, how your teeth break it down. As you swallow it, notice it going down your throat. Do the same with the drink.

3. Take 3 minutes to just sit and notice your breath. Sit in a place of your choice, could be behind your desk, or anywhere. Close your eyes. For 3 minutes, simply pay attention to your breath. For these 3 minutes, your breath gets your undivided attention. If you notice yourself thinking about something, even the thought “Why am I doing this stupid exercise?”, just notice that you’re thinking that and then gently bring your attention back to your breath.

4. Wash the dishes. If you’re not used to doing dishes, there will be many benefits to this one. As you begin to wash the dishes, notice the texture of the plate and the warmth of the water on your hands. Inhale and notice if there is any scent. Listen to hear the rush of the water or any other sounds that are happening around you. Not only will you be able to practice being in the moment, but many of your family and friends will be thrilled with you.

5. Take a bath or shower. Preferably a bath if you have one, but even with a shower, you can take your moment in the shower or bath to feel the warmth of the water or feel how your body is immersed in the water. How does your skin feel? Do you notice any smells? Is your hair wet? Just be in the moment and notice all your senses … breathe.

6. Make love slightly slower for a few moments. As you are making love to your significant other, take a moment to purposely move slightly slower. As you do this begin to mentally feel over all parts of your body. How your skin feels when touching his/hers, how are you breathing? Are you sweating? Is there a scent in the air? Take a moment and really be there making love.

7. Smell a flower for an extra breath. This one I love. Often times I will be passing by a flower and if I remember to smell it, I take an extra inhalation to really get the full experience of the scent. You will be surprised how much that extra inhalation makes a difference in the experience.

8. Be silly. I’m serious;). Being silly allows your creative juices to flow and your creative juices is what life is all about. Letting yourself be silly can also be very relaxing and create joyful situations that are full of meaning.

9. Write a letter to someone close to you … telling them how much you appreciate them. This is not a new idea by any stretch, yet it is always worth mentioning since it is so meaningful. A letter that that person will always cherish.

10. Remind yourself that you are a miracle. This may be the most important. How they heck did any of us get here? When we break it down to nanotechnology and quantum physics, scientists are stumped to figure out the great mystery of us physically being here and interacting and creating symbols and concepts and communicating.

It’s boggling. That’s why our moments on this earth are so precious, and it is a wonderful gift to attempt to cultivate those moments in life that you consider to be sacred.

You get the idea … try it out.

What works for you in bringing meaning to your life? Please share your thoughts, stories and questions below. Your interaction provides a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.

Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com