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Posts Tagged ‘Mindfulness’
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Tuesday, January 12th, 2010Calming Your Anxious Mind: An Interview with Jeff Brantley, M.D.
Saturday, December 19th, 2009Today I bring to you a wonderful mindfulness teacher, Psychiatrist and author, Jeff Brantley, M.D.. Jeff is Founder and Director of the Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) Program at Duke University’s Center for Integrative Medicine, and author of the popular book Calming Your Anxious Mind: How Mindfulness & Compassion Can Free You from Anxiety, Fear, & Panic
In this interview Dr. Brantley answers some important questions about seeing a rise in anxiety in our culture, practical skills to help us out, and his favorite ways to take 5 Good Minutes in his daily life.
Elisha: In my own practice I seem to be seeing more people coming in with heightened anxiety than ever before. Have you seen a rise in anxiety, and if so, why are people so anxious right now?
Jeff: Yes, I think most folks would agree that there are even more sources of anxiety in our lives now, than even when I wrote the first edition of Calming Your Anxious Mind in 2003.
Obviously, worries about the economy and jobs have worsened since then, and with that are the related issues of health care costs and availability to millions of Americans. Plus there is the on-going global issue with radical fundamentalism and the harsh facts that our country has deployed its military men and women multiple times to fight in both Iraq and Afghanistan. Then, there is the disturbing information about environmental changes and global warming perhaps unfolding more rapidly than previously expected.
And, against all of these serious matters, our country’s political and cultural atmosphere seems to have become even more polarized and calcified into vastly different ideological camps with one result being a degradation of civility and tolerance in public discourse and in many individual relationships. Such intolerance and mistrust surely works against enacting any positive plan of response on a national and international level, and it likely also contributes to some increased despair in the general public about the ability of our government, and ourselves, to deal with these massive problems.
So, if fear is a natural response to a perceived threat, and “anxiety” is a state of feeling fear when there is actually no immediate threat, or a feeling of fear in excess to the danger of the threat, then I think all of these factors contribute to folks feeling more anxiety-excess fear in daily life-about these things.
In short, they may be feeling fear about ideas that have not happened, or that have happened but have not impacted their lives directly, or that they have little capacity to actually affect, except to worry about them.
Also, I think that our media and sensationalist news driven culture has contributed to the general anxiety by so often showing (often in grim or gruesome detail) very disturbing images and stories, and (to my way of thinking anyway) rarely leaving the viewer with anything positive, or any real resolution or action they can take in the situation.
Then, there is the whole range of everyday issues that folks have to deal with, just living and raising families. They haven’t gone anywhere, but now exist against this larger background of national and international issues.
In short, I think folks nowadays have even more to “worry” about and, too often, still have little guidance or support in managing the disturbing impact of the constant “news” about how bad things are.
Elisha: In light of this, what are some practical skills you can share with readers of the Mindfulness and Psychotherapy Blog to calm their anxious minds?
Jeff:
- The first “skill” is actually a perspective, or wise view, you might say. That is, you are not your thoughts, and your anxiety is not a permanent identity. Anxiety is not who you are.Once a person understands that the anxious thoughts they experience are only thoughts, and are not permanent, and probably not even accurate in some fundamental way, then the “scary story” in those thoughts will lose considerable power over them.
And, even if there is some truth to the “scary story”, that the danger is real (one may lose a job, for example, or a loved one may be deployed to Afghanistan), it is still important to recognize that the thoughts one’s mind generates about a situation can either be helpful or add to the anxiety. For example, if one becomes stuck, ruminating on the mere possibility of losing one’s job, what is happening is that each of those worried thoughts is a signal to the body that danger is present. So, through the mind-body connections, the worried thoughts signal the body to go into the “fight or flight” response. The body does, and becomes hyperaroused and ready to act.
If a person understands this reaction to threat in their own mind and body, and knows how their own thoughts about what is happening actually can contribute to the feelings of fear, then the next “skills” become more important.
- The second skill then would be having a method of strengthening and sustaining self-reflection or self-awareness (something many call “mindfulness”) of what is actually going on in the mind and body. So, the noticing of bodily arousal, plus the noticing of mental/cognitive and emotional reactions and “stories” can be developed as a “skill” using mindfulness.
- Then, the skill of wise response can be utilized. This can include acknowledging what is happening and taking any possible practical steps to meet the problem. For example, checking with one’s boss about the likelihood of actually losing the job. Or, developing a plan of what to do if that happens, etc.And, the wise response must also include coping skillfully and compassionately with one’s own inner life, and reactions to the situation. Some people call this “emotion-focused coping” as compared to the “problem-focused coping” when one develops a plan for getting a new job. So, if the mind is worried and the body is agitated, having some methods to soothe the mind and body that are constructive and positive. These could include practicing meditation, using spiritual life, talking and gaining support from loved ones, eating better, exercising, etc, etc.
In Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction Classes, we often say “you can’t stop the waves (of stress), but you can learn to surf.”
In part what we mean is that you can learn to recognize the “waves” of inner reactivity to stressors, and learn to “ride” them without making them stronger or succumbing to them.
Elisha: If you were sitting across the table from somebody who was really experiencing deep emotional suffering, what kind of wisdom could you give to them?
Well, that’s a tough one.
I might begin with simply acknowledging that they are suffering. Saying something like, “I am so sorry that you have to go through this.” And, acknowledging ( to myself and to the other) that there is only so much anyone can do to take it away, but knowing that the act of bearing witness is extraordinarily powerful and comforting. Something like: “I know I cannot take your pain away. I know it is here and, and I am here with you.”
Then, I think a great gift for someone in pain is simply to ask them what they need or want, in that moment. If you can assist that, then do it. If you cannot, (and many times you will not be able to), then staying present with them is very important, if they want that.
I think many, maybe all of us; have a tendency to want to “fix” our loved ones pain, for reasons both altruistic and selfish. Altruistic because we are moved by genuine compassion to relieve the pain of another, and selfish because we can also be so threatened by the pain or vulnerability in another that we cannot tolerate being with it (or them), and hence we are “driven” to “fix” or remove the pain.
So, I think any “wisdom” is best generated from the position of willingness to simply be present (and perhaps to be silent) for the other person. Then, as we are listening both to them and to ourselves, the “wisdom” that is most appropriate in that moment might find its voice through us.
Thank you so much Jeff!
To the readers: As always, please share your questions, thoughts, and stories below. Your interaction here provides a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.
Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com
Are You Running Toward Your Death Without Even Knowing It?
Friday, December 18th, 2009Recently I heard Jon Kabat-Zinn, author of the popular books Wherever You Go, There You Are
This may sound trite and played out to some (note: recognize the judgment), but really, isn’t it time to open up to our lives right here, right now instead of always rushing to the next moment. In the big scheme of things we really are running toward our deaths, even if just in our minds.
When we take a step back, breathe, and look at this, most of us agree that this isn’t the way we want to live our lives.
So what’s the problem?
The problem is that we’re stuck, stuck in very strong conditioned habits of doing things. Stuck in social dynamics that trigger reactions in us, below our awareness, to think and act the ways we’re trying to change. Have you ever noticed that you act a similar way when you go home for the holidays as you did when you were a kid? The same dynamics often play out because your mind gets triggered with old patterns and it’s quite unconscious.
Let me also say this. Changing this intrapersonal and interpersonal dynamic does not have to be this grand proclamation at the New Year. It doesn’t have to be a big resolution, which often doesn’t work anyway. Why? Because we set them up in ways that eventually seem overwhelming to our minds and so our motivation weans.
Instead, choose moments to begin changing the circuitry in your brains. Each time you stop and take a moment out of auto-pilot and pay attention to this present moment we begin changing the neural patterns of our brains. It may not seem like much at the moment, but research is pointing the way in showing us we can actually change our brains and therefore, change our minds and vice versa.
So, why wait for the New Year, start right now, in this moment. There’s no need to race toward our deaths or even rush home to relax, take a moment to breathe, relax and let be. When the mind says, “been there, done that,” choose to engage the attitude of beginner’s mind and see things as if for the first time.
I know I’ve mentioned this one before, and I’ll be putting up more videos, but for now, you can engage with this 5-Minute STOP practice if you would like guidance.
As always, please share your thoughts about what works for you in becoming more present to your life? Or what are some ways you think you’re “racing toward your death?” Every interaction below provides a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.
Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com
Reconnect to Your Life Today! An Interview with Jack Kornfield
Friday, December 18th, 2009In an earlier interview, Jack Kornfield shared with us his insights into mindfulness and psychotherapy. I am thrilled to have him hear again and today he gets practical with us, talking about the importance of creating connection to life, some ways to go about it, and our innate capacities for understanding, well-being, and joy.
For those who do not know Jack Kornfield, let me introduce him. He is one of the true leaders of our time in respect to the marriage of Eastern and Western Psychology. He stands alongside an esteemed group of elders such as Thich Nhat Hanh, Sharon Salzberg, Pema Chodron, and Joseph Goldstein in bringing mindfulness to the west. Not only that, he also holds his PhD in clinical Psychology which makes him so relevant to the connection between mindfulness and psychotherapy.
He co-founded Insight Meditation Society in Barre, Massachussets and is a founding teacher of the well known retreat center Spirit Rock, in Woodacre, Ca. He has taught in Centers and University settings worldwide with teachers such as Thich Nhat Hanh and the Dalai Lama. He is also author of many widely popular books translated in over 20 languages, some of which are, A Path with Heart
Elisha: Jack, one of the things you talk about in your book, The Wise Heart, is creating this sacred connection to life. It’s always been important to me to make things really accessible. What are some practical ways we can nurture our sacred connection to life?
Jack: There are many simple ways we can reconnect and these are things that we all know. First stop, take a breath and listen deeply. You are surrounded by mystery. Open to the wild variation of human incarnation, the play of your own consciousness. Become present where you are. Extend this presence by taking a walk in nature, walk by the ocean, by the mountains, wherever you are take some time to quiet your mind and open the heart. Look around when you’re not so hurried and look in the eyes of the people you love or watch the rain clouds scudding by and the amazing colors and the puddles outside the office where you work. Sense the everpresent dance of change, how your life is unpredictable and uncertain and then remember that you have the capacity to be present in every moment for its mysterious unfolding.
Another way to reconnect is through ritual. I tell stories inThe Wise Heart about a therapist who worked mostly with trauma victims and people who had been tortured. It was hard to carry these stories and it was not enough to simply listen. It became important it was for her to create an altar for that which she held sacred and place on it Buddha and Kwan Yin and Mother Mary and Guadelupe and Kali and a passage about the mercy of Allah from the Koran. She honored all these different expressions of the divine and placed them for her clients to see so the people that she worked would also allow a sacred compassion to hold their pain. In some way it helped her too, so she didn’t have to carry all the suffering in her own body and individual psyche.
There is a whole chapter in The Wise Heart on the skillful use of ritual, not in a religious way, but as a reminder to bring us back to that which is sacred. We all know ways to do this. Sometimes it’s as simple as lighting a candle or washing our hands and taking a few mintues to sit quietly and meditate and pray or just return our gazing to the mystery of the maple tree outside our window.
Elisha: My dissertation was around cultivating sacred moments, that was the topic and the actual name of it, and I knew something was happening in our culture when it was published in a mainstream journal. I really came to realize that people have the ability to cultivate these moments and the number one word that came out for most people was this idea of “connection”. That’s what people felt most often was this sense of connection which was tied to various areas of feeling well and various areas of stress reduction and relaxing into the moment.
Jack: As you can see in reading The Wise Heart , which is brings the western and eastern psychological traditions together, that one of the great underlying principles is that we already contain the wisdom and capacities that we seek, just as your research showed you. Our instinct and intuition, when not blocked, gives us intimate access to well-being, understanding, to a sense of connection and the sacred. When western psychology and psychiatry limits itself to the focus on disease and its cures, the DSM (Diagnostic Statistical Manual) and the medical model of psychology and psychiatry, we only talk about half the game or less. Because there is so much more to life and our humanity blossoms in our human capacity for connecting, for understanding, for well-being, and for joy. I elaborate on this with many stories. All of these other capacities are there in us.
We admire these qualities in Nelson Mandela, Aung San Suu Kyi, or the Dalai Lama, people we see as exemplars of this human possibility for the world. When Nelson Mandela walked out of 27 years in Robbin Island Prison after being tortured and confined and was still able to meet the world with enormous graciousness of heart, compassion and forgiveness it demonstrated our human birthright,, our innate capacity to be free inwardly, no matter where we are. There is no one who can imprison our heart and our soul. To know these capacities is extremely important when we try to bring together the great psychologies of the world and move toward collective healing. Psychology is not just about pathology, but it’s about seeing our inner freedom and connectedness, the compassion and the innate dignity and beauty of the human spirit. When we find this beauty in ourselves, then it becomes a gift to those that we encounter or those that we work with.
Thank you so much Jack for being with us and sharing your insights and wisdom.
As always, please share your thoughts, stories, and questions below. Your interaction here provides a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.
Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com
Mindful Recovery and Relapse Prevention for the Holidays
Sunday, December 13th, 2009As family and friends begin to gather during the holidays at one point or another may have to face either ourselves or a loved one with addiction. There are really very few people who are not touched by addiction in one way or another. Addiction comes in the form of alcohol, drugs, sex, shopping, eating, sugar, and other compulsive behaviors that are an avoidance strategy and eventually cause distress.
When caught up in the cycle of addictive behavior, there is an inability to accept whatever is being felt in the present moment and the mind is constantly wandering onto the next ‘fix.’ So it’s safe to conclude that addiction often builds a wall of disconnection and makes it difficult to actually be present for the holidays.
If you or someone you love struggles with addictive behavior I recommend checking out the Mindfulness and Addiction series I wrote about earlier in the year.
- Mindfulness and Addiction Part I
- Mindfulness and Addiction Part II
- Mindfulness and Addiction Part III
Aside from those, it may be a good idea to do a bit of preparing and planning for the holidays. Here are some tips:
- Plan some activities that don’t focus on alcohol, like games, sports, or talking
- Be aware that there may be people who have addictive behaviors and don’t make the flaw of saying, “Hey, how come you’re not drinking?” In other words, don’t bring attention to the fact that someone isn’t drinking.
- If you have an addictive behavior, make sure you have a trusty alternative. Remember, cravings often last a maximum of 20-30 minutes. Bring a bottle of water or if sugar isn’t your addiction, make sure to bring some chocolate with you, sometimes sugar can trick the brain into feeling satisfied.
- Keep a number on you of a trusted friend or someone who can talk you down if a craving pops up.
- Take a time-out and go to the bathroom or outside and practice some mindfulness with urge surfing or another short mindfulness practice, or maybe go on a walk. If you’d like to practice mindfulness as an approach for addiction and relapse prevention, you can check out the CD program Mindful Solutions for Addiction and Relapse Prevention.
You may want to write some of this on a card and take it with you to remember because the brain may not function that clearly when cravings hit.
As much as possible, practice kindness with yourself and others during this holiday.
Please share what works for you below or any comments and questions you may have. Your interaction provides a living wisdom for us all to benefit from.
Reposted from Elisha Goldstein’s Mindfulness Blog on Psychcentral.com
